What should I do if a manager is dating an employee? - HR Insights
- Sean Hansen, SHRM-CP
- 30 minutes ago
- 2 min read
What should I do if a manager is dating an employee?
Question:
Recently, there have been rumors at my company that a manager is dating someone on their team. It’s not confirmed, but I’m worried that if they are in a relationship, it could cause some issues. When does this become something I have to worry about? What should I do if a manager is dating an employee?
Answer:
Having a policy in place to limit conflicts of interest is key. The company should be empowered to prevent conflicts of interests through transfer or even termination, especially in cases where the relationship is between a manager and employee.
Long Answer
Manager and employee, kissing in a tree, while an interesting twist on the rhyme, sounds like more of a nightmare in the world of business.  There’s a lot of reasons why you don’t want a manager dating their employee – conflict of interest, preferential treatment, the fall out between employees if the relationship ends, etc. But how do you mitigate those risks?
It’s important to have a policy in place for workplace relationships, even those that don’t involve a manager and subordinate. Relationships can cause tensions in the workplace if not properly handled, and it can create other issues that a company has to deal with. That’s not to say a company has to ban relationships all together, they can work, as long as the company has a policy in place to deal with those issues.
Any policy on workplace relationships needs to account for conflicts of interest. Do two employees being in a relationship present conflict that would prevent them from doing their job? Could it result in preferential treatment that would cause inequity amongst other employees? This is why many workplace relationship policies require disclosure of workplace relationships – so that the company can investigate if there is any chance for a conflict of interest. Especially in manager-employee relationships, the company may even need to change or even terminate an employee’s position to avoid a conflict of interest. A policy setting this expectation can help discourage manager-employee relationships, or at least shield the company from some liability if a transfer or termination is necessary.
Now, some employers may prefer to simply prohibit relationships all together, in the attempt to keep things simple. While that certainly is true, it does come with risks of its own. It may cause employees to date in secret, which leaves the company with all the same problems, but no way to mitigate them in advance. In addition, there are occasionally laws that might prevent this approach: for example, in San Francisco, an employer cannot create a policy that prevents workplace relationships, except for those that have a conflict of interest.
Relationships in the workplace don’t always spell disaster. As long as a company stays on top of any potential conflicts of interest, love can stay in the air, and the employees can keep sitting in that tree, as long as it isn’t on company property.
What should I do if a manager is dating an employee?
Please note: This information is not legal advice and may not reflect specific state or local requirements.